Wednesday, February 23, 2011


It should probably raise some sort of red flag (but it doesn't) whenever I hear Sloan in the bathtub singing/rapping to himself for extended periods of time. Or sitting in the bed free styling. Or in the car. In the kitchen. You get what I'm saying.

This time, however, my little man actually recorded himself, laid his adorable r&b track over the beat from the I am T-Pain app, and presented it to me:

So, if you listened carefully, you may have gleaned from the lyrics some false information. Sloan seems to be implying that I have, somehow, not been acting like my usual, irresistible self since becoming plump with his seed. This is a misjudgment on his part. I am fun and happy! And JOLLY.

Always have been, always will be.

Let us remember that not all behavior is indicative of one's true disposition. Just because I bathe erratically, clean erratically, and eat not erratically doesn't make me anything but the same old Julia!!! And if you're wondering, I have always called Sloan things like "detestable ogre" and "morally corrupt poptart;" that's nothing new. And honestly, I have been flipping off bad drivers since I was a kid. Also, my affinity for tripping the elderly in public is just some weird quirk, everybody has 'em right? And you should know that the kitten-skinning incident a few weeks ago was seriously just a one time thing (don't ask ME why some people find it so satisfying). And, finally, no...there is not a homeless person stuffed in my TRUNK! I am offended by the mere insinuation.

1 comment:

  1. I thought I broke you from that flipping off thing. We want more Sloan songs.
    He should do lyrics for Richard's creations.