Tuesday, July 12, 2011


I'm in love with and married to a multi-faceted and mysterious man.

A man who can fix car things like power windows and coolant...stuff.  A man who watches So You Think You Can Dance. A man who lifts heavy things for me, but only if I have a good reason now after figuring out that I wanted the living room rearranged just to see his muscles.

A ski instructor. A man who has explained the concept of electricity to me about seven times. An Alaskan. An athlete. A man who always beats me at crosswords, because somehow he knows things like the Latin word for pants.

A man who speaks funny-sounding Spanish. A man who wears velcro Dr. Scholl's shoes with J.Crew pants. A culinary artist.

Early in our courtship:
Julia: It smells good in here! What are you making?
Sloan: Cheese beaner bacon.
Julia: Cheese, bean, or bacon?
Sloan: No, not "or." It's all of them. Cheese beaner bacon.
Julia: Is that supposed to sound racist?
Sloan: What?
Julia: Guess not. What's in it?
Sloan: Well, ya take a piece of bread. You pour a can of pork and beans on it.
Julia: Oh dear.
Sloan: And then you cover it with shredded cheddar. Fry up some bacon, put it on top. Then throw it all in the oven for a little while, until the cheese is nice and melted.
Julia: I don't...
Sloan: I came up with it myself. It's my go-to meal.
Julia: Of course it is. You eat this meal frequently and can still fit into MY pants. Makes total sense.

Just yesterday:
Julia: You making cheese beaner bacon, baby?
Sloan: Yeah, sort of. We don't have bacon, so I'm using a hot dog.
Sloan: *unimpressed* No, Julia. It's cheese beaner bacon with a hot dog substitute. That's what it's called.
Julia: Oh...okay. Yeah. *stares at ground* Hey! I want to take a picture of this for the blog. I have friends who don't believe me that you actually eat this.
Sloan: What? No, don't take a picture. No one cares. Stop it--I'm not...put down the camera. I'm not--fine, I'll set it down and you can take a picture. I don't wanna be in it.

Did I mention he also watches Top Chef?
That must have some sort of meaning.
So, here it is folks.

Here it is.


  1. I'm a huge fan of baked beans but that seriously just looks nasty!!

  2. By the way, I think he should keep the wiener title, it's hilarious!

  3. G.R.O.S.S. Never feed that too my children Sloan.

  4. It must be a family thing. This is Darth's go to meal when i'm away. You will never catch me eating it!

  5. It's was not made up by Sloan - it's a family thing. Although, they eat it in England all the time, but don't use bacon or even cheese sometimes and dont have such a creative name for it - beans on toast.

  6. I was talking about Sloan making up the name, not the dish. My bad. But thanks for keeping everyone honest, Regen.

  7. Cheese beener weener!!!! bahahahahahhaha!!!

  8. HOLY COW! HOW COME I DIDN"T THINK OF THIS! I want to try it!! It looks amazing! This will definitely be one of my main college meals!

  9. Thats what I meant - Sloan didn't make up the name. That's what we call it.

  10. Ah, yes, he just told me he didn't make up the name. I guess I really wanted to believe that only he would come up with such a racially-ambiguous but strangely delightful name instead of the entire Rehder family. *hangs head*

  11. Andy would be SOOOOO happy if I made this for him.

    I never will.

    And in 18 months of marriage he has forgotten how to grocery shop and operate the oven.

    So, no cheese beaner bacon (with or without hotdog substitute) will ever be eaten in my home.