Monday, September 26, 2011

This Old Thing...?

A lot of blogs that I follow belong to these adorable Mormon housewives who are so nice and fashionable and have beautiful houses and fabulous teeth (not that you'd know, because they never post teeth close ups...come on, ladies! We want teeth close ups! Don't hide your candle under a bushel!) Anyway, they have all done these little Q&A posts talking about themselves because they get so many people emailing them with questions about themselves. Well, I decided to do one of those, too, because I have, in fact, gotten fan mail myself. I got it back in October from a person named Will Hager, a sweet and intelligent man who showed such an appreciation for my work. This is what he said:

Hello Ma'am,

I work as an auditor for a suisse bank. A dormant account with a deposit valued at $21 million dollars plus accumulated interest was discovered by me. 
I find myself privileged to have this information and am willing to collaborate. The money will be banked in the Carribean Islands, being a tax free, safe haven for money and we can share it and use for investment of our choice. I have all secret details and necessary contacts for your claim of this inheritance with no encumbrance.

Wonderful Regards,

Will Hager

Thank you for the kind words and insightful questions, Mr. Hager!

My, where to begin! So many questions about boring old me! Let's see... first of all, I was born and raised in Memphis, Tennessee. My father is an astronaut, and my mother is Queen Elizabeth. I went to MIT Elementary School, where I was best friends with a person named Hillary Clinton. I now work as an assassin and I do a little modeling on the side. So that's it, really!

I'll start making this a regular thing so be on the lookout for my next post on my favorite Costco smoothie flavors!

I'd like to thank all of you who wrote in with so many interesting questions. It is wonderful to know that there are people out there who care. Unfortunately, I am extremely busy and cannot write back to any of you ever. Until next time!


  1. uhm, but doesn't costco only have one flavor of smoothie?

  2. Seriously - almost kill me Julia!!

  3. Are you also friends with Anna, the Soviet spy? She models as well, you know.--Queen Elizabeth