Monday, October 17, 2011

Cultural Fusion

I was in a meeting at work and the woman next to me had a rotation of cutesy images as her desktop background. Baby otters hugging, a tiger cub in a basket, yawning kittens, wet puppies, etc.

Because my fresh as hell image is an important part of my life, I should be all like, "Psssh, horsies? Pocket kitten? So pedestrian." 

But I can't fight this. I DO think that a poster of a baby sitting in a paint can and clapping for joy is undeniably adorable. I do. And I WOULD like to hang it in my room to look at on rainy afternoons when nothing else seems to be going my way. But as much as I like uncool stuff, I still really want to be cool, like hipster cool.  I want to be cool like Ira Glass. I want to be cool like Brooklyn. Cool like big scarves and buying local. Cool like Scott Pilgrim and atheism and men's v-necks. Antiques. Existential angst. Sea salt.

This is what hipsters look like, Mom.
I love babies playing saxophones and kittens hanging on to a wire with the caption "Hang in There!!" But I have also fallen for the charms of irony, and now I want to wear Ray Bans and draw pictures of lumberjacks. Dilemma. ANYWAY, I'm not just a thinker, I'm a doer:

Ideas for Posters of Animals in Wacky Situations That Hipsters Will Like
  • Hamster wearing horn-rimmed glasses while reading "Catcher in the Rye"
  • Steampunk panda
  • Tiger cubs in suspenders feeding on a Republican.
  • Baby monkey playing ukelele version of "Smells Like Teen Spirit"
  • Clown fish with handlebar mustache riding a bike with a basket on the front
  • Baby snakes at an Arcade Fire concert
  • Bunnies in fishnets and vintage lingerie
  • Prairie dog in Vans and an American Apparel hoodie high-fiving a Corgi at the Occupy Wall Street protest
  • Armadillo eating a gluten-free cookie
I don't want to jinx it, but I really think I'm getting there. 

I'll get there. 

I can feel it.


  1. That baby with the puppy is so chunky! Not even my first 2 babies were that chubby.

  2. Or an orangutan snapping his fingers at a poetry slam.

    Orangutans are totally cute.

  3. Dude! I'm a hipster! I have a huge scarf! its 18ft long.

  4. Fat baby: Is somebody next to me? I can't see you because my head is eating my eyeballs.

  5. Sorry Michelle, but I'm pretty sure you're the opposite of a hipster (un-pretentious, mellow, open-minded, etc.)

  6. Yeah, Michelle, you're more a geek-ster. but that's better, really.

  7. Woo! I was scared for a moment there... Geek-ster sound muuuuch better to me.