Friday, December 16, 2011

"I Can't Believe I Ate the Whole Thing" - Homer Simpson

I don't really "cook," per se. I do heat things up (the culinary term is "nuke"). I can also stack my edibles (sandwiching), and I have been known to combine two cereals in the same bowl once or twice in my life. *brushes shoulder off* There is also one other thing I can make: cinnamon and sugar pretzel bites.


PRETZEL BITES



I SAID

PRETZEL BITES.


PRET


ZEL


BITES

Let me tell you a little story about pretzel bites.

The other day I was on a walk enjoying the majestic beauty of the snow-capped mountains when I thought it would be fun to have-OKAY I ATE ALL OF THE PRETZEL BITES. THERE I SAID IT. I MADE TWO DOZEN (THAT'S 24) AND ATE THEM ALL BEFORE SLOAN WOKE UP FROM HIS HOUR-LONG NAP I AM DISGUSTING AND HAVE NO SELF CONTROL AND  THAT'S WHAT WE DO IN AMERICA.

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