Tuesday, April 3, 2012

How to Make a Move

Getting everything packed and ready to move to a new home can be very stressful. In fact, during the process, you may begin to wonder why you have any stuff at all. You may become so delirious that you ask preposterous questions such as: Is there a reason that our family of three owns 37 plates? Who bought all of these decorative coasters? And why does Julia a person own 29 pairs of shoes? I mean, you can only wear one (MAYBE two) pairs at a time, so what's with the extra 27?

Wow, what dumb questions! Stop acting so crazy!

*ahem* Hello, my name is Julia Rehder, and welcome to my instructional article "How to Make a Move," where I will share with you some simple tips on how to pack up all of your damn stuff.

Step One: Put your dishes out!

Stacked plates and carefully-arranged cups inherently look so organized, that by simply having them out in the open, you look like you have things under control. Who cares if you don't actually need to pack any of those items for another two weeks? Go ahead and get 'em out! This step is essential in keeping up your moving morale because it makes you feel more organized than you really are. And don't be afraid of putting out your dishes...do you only have two mugs? No problem! Your "other" mugs are just in the dishwasher! Do your plates mismatch? You're so whimsical! And while you're at it, a well-placed plastic bin of Christmas ornaments on your kitchen table can really help give off that Better Homes and Gardens vibe.

Step Two: Don't do your laundry!

Scientists recommend that during the weeks preceding your move, you should not make an effort to do laundry. But if you MUST clean your clothes, at least do not to fold them. I repeat, it is essential that you not fold your clothes, as this is extremely helpful as you begin packing up the contents of your home. Remember, science says so, and while I probably should explain more about this, it's all a little too complicated.

Step Three: Take all of the things and put them somewhere, as long as that 'somewhere' is not the place that they actually belong.


Obviously.

4 comments:

  1. I just love your posts! You are so witty. But I NEED to know where those adorable rainbow colored stacked ice cream bowls came from. I love, love, love them!

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  2. Wait until you get to the new house to unpack. I mean, have you been in my garage?

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  3. Anthropologie!

    And Regen...ugh...I know.

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  4. There are three things I really hate in this life:
    Moving is one of them.
    I turn into a monster/basket case. It's pretty terrible. Thank you for your advice.

    ReplyDelete