Monday, June 29, 2015


WELL it's been a hot minute but here we are! A million months later and I am finally done gestating, which means the normal Julia has climbed back out of her hole of sadness. And speaking of climbing out of holes, here's my new baby!
Landon Linn Rehder
Born on New Year's Eve, this baby wanted to make sure her parents got a sizable 2014 tax refund (JUST KIDDING apparently $0 income means no refund?? THANKS, OBAMA.) 

Landon. She's chatty. She's social. She's Ward with a headband. I started writing this post when she was six weeks old, and now she's six months. So, I guess that's approximately how long it takes for me to physically, emotionally, and intellectually recover from giving birth. Piece of cake!

Ward has been a great sport about having to share his home with a new kid. He loves her to death and only occasionally asks me to "just leave her in her bed to cry alone forever." Such a sweet dude! 

It's been a bit of an adjustment to be outnumbered by my offspring all day while Sloan's at school, but I can't complain. Dealing with two kids isn't so bad when you think about the world's problems in the grand scheme of things. I mean, worse things are happening...things like genocide and stuff.  Things like hurricanes. And school shootings And Kidz Bop. So really is it THAT bad that you're crouched in an aisle at the thrift store using your own socks to wipe diarrhea off your baby's legs because you don't have any baby wipes with you? I guess not.

So what else have I been up to? Hmmm...I've been:
  • eating entire bags of chips and then bugging my eyes out when I look at their nutrition labels.
  • promising candy to Ward if he does what I tell him to, then never following through once he complies.
  • being the only person who still has ".blogspot" in my URL.
  • calling all of the local radio stations hourly and requesting "I'm a Slave 4 U" because you can't have too much of a good thing.
  • loudly complaining about chafed nipples.
  • watching increasingly disturbing reality crime shows while Sloan googles spousal mental illness.
So yeah, that's pretty much it! Guys, I know it's been a year since I last posted, so thanks for hanging in there and revisiting my blog! And special shout-out to that IP address from Sri Lanka that hits my site every day at 2 am your time! YOU WERE THERE FOR ME WHEN NO ONE ELSE WAS.